What To Do When Your Boss Makes You Feel Incompetent?
This was the fifth day in a row that Johnny was feeling incompetent. He was working his dream job. The first few months were great. He was happy doing what he loved. But nothing goes as planned, and it gets worse when your boss makes you feel incompetent.
The American Working Conditions Survey ran a survey revealing that one in five workers is abused at their workplace. The types of abuse they face are humiliation, bullying, or incompetence. Such abuse and feeling of incompetence negatively impact your mental health. So, it is time that you recognize your issue and fight back.
In this article, I have addressed this problem and offered a solution. Keep reading to find out more.
Why Does Your Boss Make You Feel Incompetent?
I get that your boss makes you feel incompetent. But why does he do so? I thought about it and came up with five reasons why your boss makes you feel incompetent.
1. Your Boss Is Incompetent
Your boss, himself/herself, may be incompetent. It is why they make you feel the same way as they are. They might lash out at you at work since they feel incompetent. There is nothing impossible about it.
2. He/She Has An Abusive Personality
Part of the reason they make you feel incompetent can be their abusive personality. It may be in their nature to humiliate people and make them feel low. In addition, they may not want you to feel secure and safe in your position at work.
3. It’s The Work Culture
Not all organizations have the same work culture or work environment. For example, it may be the work culture of an office to make people feel incompetent to work better.
4. They Are Pushing You
Some bosses have a positive attitude towards their employees and what they do; they do it with the best intentions in mind. However, it comes out wrong since they don’t know how to execute or express their intentions properly. They might want to motivate you to learn more, but their expression is inappropriate, and it makes you feel incompetent.
5. Abusive Personality
If your boss comprises an aggressive personality, then chances are there that you collapse if you are doing good work. Most of the time, bad bosses often take the impression of bringing the people down and you could instantly lose your job. Toxic bosses enjoy this that you feel awkward no matter what you do to accomplish and they will make you feel that you are not good enough to take any responsibility.
6. Company Culture
Your company culture may be to blame your boss or you may feel in the insecurity to take the turn or toll on you as well as on your colleagues in the long run. You need to follow certain factors like your corporation will allow only the strong to survive. Most of the time they would like it if all the employees worked in the same skin to uplift the company.
Things To Do When Your Boss Makes You Feel Incompetent
It becomes impossible to perform the way you want to when all you feel is incompetent at work. But what can you do when your boss makes you feel demotivated? Here are some answers to suit your current situation.
1. Stop Taking It Personally
It is in most bosses’ nature to make people feel incompetent. But in reality, all they want is to get the work done. Perhaps they are not attacking you personally or trying to harm you. They also may be out of time and resources to help you finish the project.
As a working professional and adult, you should try not to take it too personally. You can take it as an opportunity for growth. You can boost your skill, handle things your boss wants, and get rewarded by providing results. But, you shouldn’t necessarily submit to every word your boss through at you.
2. Own And Learn From Your Mistakes
I don’t want to normalize your boss, making you feel incompetent. But, if you made a mistake and had to face a heavy hour inside the boss’ cabin, then it is on you. Instead of feeling bad about what the boss said, you should learn from your mistake and answer with your work.
Owning your mistakes and learning from them grows you as a professional. Your boss also learns that you are putting extra effort into learning from your mistakes. Once you put in your effort, you can ask your boss for feedback and see how that works out.
3. Make Friends And Stand Up
It is not always out of good intentions when your boss makes you feel incompetent. Maybe it is in their nature, or they have fun doing so. In such a situation, the only thing to do is build a wall of defense. But how to do so? You can make friends with the right people and build a support group.
When you have a group of people who emotionally support you and recognize you at the workplace, things will get easier and bearable. You will start to rely less on your boss and more on your friends and yourself.
4. Pretending Is Not Always Bad
Sometimes we become what we pretend we are. When your boss constantly makes you feel incompetent, you can start pretending to be confident in front of them. It is a trick that you play with your brain to give you the confidence you need. It can help you boost your confidence and prove your worth in front of your boss.
Once you prove your worth through your work, your boss will not make you feel incompetent. In Fact, they won’t want to give up on you.
5. Practice Self Compassion And Acknowledgement
It is hard to be emotionally stable when your boss makes you feel incompetent. But you should never beat yourself up or question your skills. When no one is with you, you have to be your own shield and weapon and stand up. Self-compassion is a great way to dodge this emotional dilemma.
Be kind to yourself and value yourself. When you have confidence in yourself and your work, you can quit your job with a smile. There is no point in working in an environment that is only toxic for you. But practicing self-compassion can indeed help you.
6. Play To Your Strength
You must play to your strengths when your supervisor is picking you for the new job. Dwelling on the wrong doings can be tempting at your end. You have to get the idea about some of the excellent qualities when you are asked for any kinds of jobs.
Your manager and others can praise you while you increase your confidence in yourself and on your talents. You cannot make your selection in the incorrect end while you should play on your strengths.
7. Build Support Network
You can build the support network for your business. It can help you to assist you to reach your goals with complete ease. Once a support network is built on things are going to be easier for you.
Your friends and Co-workers must support you at your work. It can make things easier for you to tackle the situation with ease. Once your support network is strong things are going to be easier for you in all possible manner.
8. Challenge Yourself To Take Initiative
You must challenge yourself to take more initiative in the workplace. You need to get through the details to have a clear insight in which areas you lack.
You will get or feel demoralize or you may have to rise to the occasion to get set for the personal challenges. You must do this for noting your new skills that you may want to learn within a particular period.
Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs):
Here are some popular questions and answers. These may prove helpful to you.
⁍ When your boss undermines you, you can expect them to show these behaviors –
• They purposefully share your mistakes with others.
• They interrupt you at every step of the workplace.
• Your boss contradicts your opinion no matter what they are.
⁍ There are some negative effects of micromanaging on the employee. A few of them are listed here –
• low employee morale.
• Reduced productivity and patience.
• Dissatisfaction.
⁍ Here are the signs that your boss is toxic –
• People are resigning from work, and there is no explanation for it.
• They don’t offer any feedback or coaching.
• Your boss is unable to control their emotional response.
• They lack empathy.
• They don’t praise employees’ achievements.
Final Advice
It is ok to make mistakes. But if your boss yells at you for no good reason, then it is time you showed them your worth. You also need to toughen yourself up alongside boosting your skills and confidence. It is the only way to survive in the modern work culture.
You can share your views and comments in our comment box. It will assist us to know your take on this matter. You will have to identify the best option that can make things easier and effective for your career in the long run.
The tips I provided should help you deal with moments when your boss makes you feel incompetent. You will feel helped. However, if you have any further queries, you can ask them in the comment.
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Because you never know, it can’t always be a product of your own imagination! 1. Constructive Constant Criticisms: You were looking for signs your boss is testing you, but what happens when you fund out that all this while your boss was sabotaging you? Criticisms are a part of everyday work, and there’s nothing better than criticism that’s constructive. But are those criticism negatively affecting your work? Are you worried that there’s no way to earn some praise from your boss? Are you confused because your work is good, but your boss won’t stop criticizing? Chances are your boss is threatened by you and can’t stop criticizing your work as a result. 2. Zero Appreciation: One thing that I realized early on is that every employee needs a certain amount of appreciation - otherwise, there’s literally no motivation to progress. In that case, you must see if the management and especially your boss give you the appreciation you deserve. 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No Promotions: Most companies are known for giving good promotions to employees they consider assets. What about your organization? Have you seen other colleagues receive quick promotions or even financial gifts for their performances? But what about you - Did you receive similar treatment, or did the management ignore you even after you performed well? When you outshine your boss while working together on some project, it becomes a matter of pride. It is highly possible that your boss felt threatened at some point and decided to stop your promotions - your boss doesn’t want the management to notice you are as good as him! 5. No Invitations To Important Meetings: Important meetings are the key to becoming successful in the middle of corporate politics. In fact, if you are worried about why your boss calls you for important meetings, then you should immediately let out a sigh of relief - it means your boss values your opinions, and you matter to the company. But then, if those invitations suddenly stop out of the blue, it could mean so many things, but the end result is you start feeling incompetent. So when your boss makes you feel incompetent, it always doesn’t mean he is feeling threatened. It could also mean your boss is testing you, or he wants you to focus more on execution. Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs): Check out the most frequently asked questions related to how you could be threatening your boss with your skills or even personality, mentioned below. 1. How Do You Tell If Your Boss Feels Threatened By You? ⁍ You can understand your boss feels threatened by you from the signs mentioned below,• You don’t receive praise for your contributions from your boss.• He criticizes you constantly.• He keeps information from you.• Your boss doesn’t address your problems.• Your boss keeps interfering in your personal life. 2. How Can You Tell If Your Boss Is Jealous Of You? ⁍ You can easily spot jealousy in your boss simply from a few signs like,• Does he belittle your accomplishments?• Do you face constant needling?• Does he withhold information from you?• Do you face unfair criticism?• Does he assign you irrelevant projects?• Does he ignore your comments? 3. What Do You Do When Your Boss Is Intimidated By You? ⁍ If you think your boss is intimated with you, then you can check out the tips mentioned below,• Try soothing their feelings.• Try involving them in your development.• Try getting allies together.• Try understanding that some battles are not worth it.• Try keeping a track record of what’s happening. 4. How Do You Tell If You Are Being Sabotaged At Work? ⁍ You can tell you ate being sabotaged at work if you spot the signs mentioned below,• Are you facing differential treatment?• Are you getting projects nobody wants all the time?• Do colleagues lie or even snitch on you?• Do colleagues end up excluding you from social conversations?• Are you being excluded from crucial projects or meetings? And It’s A Wrap Now that you know the primary signs your boss is threatened by you, what are you waiting for? You can go back to overthinking a little and try to analyze what your boss is up to! There are several reasons why your boss could feel threatened by you. It can be any of those things, from your charming personality to your expertise. But it can also be a personal affair - did you do something wrong that you don’t even remember, but your boss sure does? 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